A naked Jackson woke me up at 3 this morning with wet sheets. All that moving around while I changed his bedding and cleaned him up and got him dressed and back to bed woke up our third little peanut. So as I was lying in bed feeling our baby swim around inside of me and thinking about the future I was unable to go back to sleep.
We have our big ultrasound tomorrow. We are still set on not finding out the gender, but I still have just as much excitement. I can't wait to see the baby again. It has been a long 13.5 weeks since I have seen that tiny, beating heart and it will be so reassuring.
It's funny how different subsequent pregnancies are from the very first. With the first you spend so much time marveling at the changes in your own body and dreaming of how your life will change and hoping you can do it. Now, I am still in awe at my body and the changes it goes through and the fact that it can support and grow this new life, but I have more confidence in myself. I know this place and these feelings. I can do this, I just hope I can keep my other little guys' worlds from being turned upside down.
I haven't had much time to dwell on worrying with this pregnancy, but I do have the same worries as last time. Will I have enough? Enough time, love, patience to give them all what they deserve? I know it all miraculously and beautifully ends up working somehow, but that doesn't keep me from fretting over these things sometimes.
I can't wait to meet this new little bundle and discover a new personality and witness another special sibling bond. It has been amazing to watch Jackson and Patrick and see how natural and special their relationship is.
I feel lucky that I will get to witness many more moments like this one. Being a mom is beautiful thing and I can't wait to fill our house and hearts with more love! Please think of us tomorrow and pray for a healthy baby.